This post comes with a bit of grim understanding. Growing up I had a ton of personal superheroes. This could have been because I was a geekish child (and adult!) and I equated their presence in my life to being like superheroes. And as I aged I came to realize with the faults they made that my superhereos where not immortal and were prone to make mistakes. At first I thought it was my fault. Because superheroes never make mistakes right (;P) but that isn’t the case. I think that for every superhero mortality exists. It what makes them relatable it’s what makes us love them as we do. Because if no mortality existed in them they wouldn’t be as appealing. That isn’t to say that some of our hero’s aren’t all human their are tons of superbad-ass alien heroes (but generally they have some kind of human likeness). Anywho back to the topicat hand.
At first I couldn’t acknowledge that my heroes made mistakes. Big ones. Life altering ones. I blamed myself at first. Then I became resentful for them letting me down. I was so angry. I didn’t understand why they weren’t swooping in to save the day. Why they weren’t fixing this. Heck, even recently, I have to let go of the last of my childhood superhero ideals because I realized that, that person was also subject to being human. And made mistakes. Ones that hurt me. And once again I became angry. Of course I recovered from it much more quickly because I had become accustomed to being let down by those I had dubbed heroes.
I think that at this stage in my life I finally come to accept that my superheroes make mistakes too. I no longer resent them for it because I see we all make mistakes. Some people make bigger mistakes than others. And some people suffer more for one’s actions than others. I am no longer devastated. I have grown used to the notion that like them I will make mistakes. And hope for the forgiveness of one who may look up to me in the future.